Several college/grad school students were asked the following problem: Prove that all odd integers higher than 2 are prime.
mathematician: 3 is prime, 5 is prime, 7 is prime, and by induction, we have
that all the odd integers are prime.'
Physicist: 3 is prime, 5 is prime, 7 is prime, 9 is … uh, 9 is an
experimental error, 11 is prime, 13 is prime… Well, it seems that
you're right.'
Quantum Physicist: All numbers are equally prime and non-prime until observed.
Chemist: '3 is prime, 5 is prime, 7 is prime.. that's enough.'
Cosmologist: 3 is prime, yes it is true….
Engineer: 3 is prime, 5 is prime, 7 is prime, 9 is …, 9 is
…, well if you approximate, 9 is prime, 11 is prime, 13 is prime…
Well, it does seem right.'
Engineer: 3 is prime, 5 is prime, 7 is prime, 9 is not working, fetch
toolbox.
Engineer: 3 is prime, 5 is prime, 7 is prime, 9 is prime, 11 is prime…
[Continue until told to go home by others]
Computer scientist: I've just whipped up a program to REALLY go and prove
it…' He goes over to his terminal and runs his program. Reading
the output on the screen he says, '1 is prime, 1 is prime, 1 is prime,
1 is prime….'
Computer scientist using Unix: 3's a prime, 5's a prime, 7's a prime,
segmentation fault
Computer Scientist: 3 is prime, 5 is prime, 7 is prime, 7 is prime,
7 is prime, 7 is prime… Bus error. Core dumped.
The computer programmer method is:
'3 is prime, 5 is prime, 7 is prime, 9 is prime, 9 is prime, 9 is prime,
9 is …'
Opps, let's try that again:
'3 is prime, 5 is prime, 7 is prime, 9 is … 3 is prime, 5 is prime,
7 is prime, 9 is … 3 is …'
Um, right. Okay, how about this:
'3 is not prime, 5 is not prime, 7 is not prime, 9 is not prime…'
So much for the beta releases. Ship this:
'3 is prime, 5 is prime, 7 is prime, 9 is a feature, 11 is prime…'
and put on the cover 'More prime numbers than anyone else in the
industry!'
—
Coming soon:
'3 is a prime, 4 is a feature, 5 is a prime, 6 is a feature, 7 is a prime,
8 is not yet implemented, 9 is our backwards compatibilty module, …'
Windows programmer: 1 is prime. Wait.
Mac programmer: Now why would anyone want to know about that? That's not
user friendly. You don't worry about it, we'll take care of it for you.
Bill Gates: 1. No one will ever need any more then 1.
TRS-80 Computer Programmer: One is prime, Two is prime, Three is prime, Out of
Memory
Software tech support operator: Well, we haven't had any reports of
composite odd numbers… do you have the latest version of ZFC?
Logician:
Hypothesis: All odd numbers are prime
Proof:
1) If a proof exists, then the hypothesis must be true
2) The proof exists; you're reading it now.
From 1 and 2 follows that all odd numbers are prime
Confused Undergraduate: Yes, it's true. Proof: Let p be any prime
number larger than 2. Then p is not divisible by 2, so p is odd. QED
Linguist: 3 is prime, 5 is prime, 7 is prime, 9 aaah. I can make 9 a prime.
Linguist: are you lot going to shut up and buy me a beer or not?
Philosopher : why don't we just call all the odd numbers prime and call
all the prime numbers odd, that way all the odd numbers would be prime
Philosopher: 3 is prime. Hum, thats an interesting statment, I'll get
one of my research students to look into that.
Economist: 'Assume 9 is prime…'
Economist: 2 is a prime, 4 is a prime.
Theologian: 3 is prime and that's good enough for me!
The Psychiatrist: 1 is prime, 3 is prime, 5 is prime, 7 is prime, 9 is prime
but trying to supress it, 11 is prime……
Shrink: 3 is prime, 5 is prime etc… And how could one specify 'prime' anyway?
Sociologist: 3 is a number, 3 is prime, all numbers are prime.
Lawyer: 3 is prime, yet 5 could be anything, taking into account, but not
limited to, the fact that 4 may or may not be prime, depending on the
witnesses' testimonies and the written evidence furnished.
Accountant: 3 is prime, 5 is prime, 7 is prime, 9 is prime, deducing 10%
tax and 5% other obligations.
Politician: 3 is prime, 5 is prime, 7 is prime, 9 is composite, 11 is
prime — we can ignore 9 because the primes have a majority.
Manager: 3 yes, 5 yes, 7 YES, 9 Now let's take a positive attitude here
QA: 1 is not proven, 2 no and reported, 3 not proven, 4 no and reported,
…
Butcher: Prime? What do numbers have to do with meat?
Crank: 9 IS PRIME! NOW WHERE IS THE CAPS UNLOCK?
